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Eliza May Brown



I Did Not Know This

Posted on August 25, 2020 at 10:49 PM Comments comments (0)
"Parrot parents give their kids unique names and they call each other by them for life."


What the hay?

Posted on December 2, 2019 at 11:34 PM Comments comments (10)
The headline: "Airline passengers spend 11 Hours in the air going nowhere thanks to volcanic eruption and horses." The story: "A flight from Amsterdam to Mexico City was over Canada when the decision was made to turn around. The airplane returned to the airport it originated from, making this a very long flight that ultimately went nowhere." Apparently a volcanic eruption mean they couldn't land where they expected to, and a cargo of horses meant that they couldn't land anywhere else. (The story doesn't explain why.) In the comments section: "Oh great. Flying with emotional support horses now. What next???"

Sunday Dinner

Posted on October 6, 2019 at 7:06 PM Comments comments (372)
The Gazette has a historical section "Back Pages" where they report what was news. This segment ran in 1919.

"'Take out the lost ad, I've found my ring,' [a lady] requested yesterday. 'Good! Did the Gazette help you?' she was asked. 'Not unless my hens read the paper. [The ring] was in the craw of a chicken we killed for Sunday dinner.' Gazette lost ads usually get results. They offered a reward for the return of the jewel. But did the chicken get it?"

Yes, the chicken got it...with mashed potatoes, stuffing, and gravy....

I Read it on the Internet...

Posted on August 31, 2019 at 7:15 PM Comments comments (5) it must be true.

The national animal of Scotland is the unicorn!  "The ideal it represents are what make it a perfect fit as the national animal of Scotland because, like this proud beast, Scots would fight to remain unconquered."

News of/from/for the Weird

Posted on July 27, 2019 at 4:26 PM Comments comments (205)
"An unnamed woman in Wichita Falls, TX was banned from Walmart after a store employee reported the woman ate half a cake from the bakery, then attempted to buy the other half (for half-price), saying she found the cake in that condition. In another Wichita Falls Walmart a woman rode an electric cart around the store's parking lot while guzzling wine from a Pringles can. She was also Walmart-shunned."

Two comments--I've lived in Wichita Falls. It's not that big. Two Walmarts seem excessive. And, secondly, I have to commend the scooter lady on her creative recycling of a Pringles can.


Ripped from the Headlines

Posted on July 25, 2019 at 8:45 PM Comments comments (223)
"A woman chased after a flasher and pinned him down after he exposed himself to her during an early morning run because she 'was not ready to see his little nut.'

The mother of two was allegedly flashed twice by the same man while jogging near a river in the US city of Boston.But the man got more than he bargained for when the 6ft 1in Israeli military veteran sprinted after him and grabbed him as he tried to flee."

From US Independent and reprinted on Yahoo News

You go, girl!

Real Life

Posted on July 23, 2019 at 12:57 PM Comments comments (1)
Last week a homeless guy wandered into our church to tell me about his conversation with Satan. I took notes because I am absolutely going to work this into a story someday. Here's what I've got:

Physical description: lean, leathery, neatly trimmed white beard and hair; estimated age sixty-ish; certainly does not "look" homeless/crazy/etc. He wore a wedding ring. His tee shirt was on inside-out and backwards because, he said, there was a picture of George W. Bush on the front. 

He told me he has a wife and five-year-old daughter. He heard a male voice--not human--one night. It laughed at him and said, "Leave." The man is very afraid; "He's coming. I don't know who he was. One of his minions. I get all goofy, and it's not the meds. The voices are there."

Who you gonna call?

Posted on June 15, 2019 at 4:13 PM Comments comments (2)
"JBW of Webster, MA, got a free ride from police after refusing to leave a bar on May 5. But as he sat in the back seat, he repeatedly called 911. Finally the officers pulled over to make him stop, but he became uncooperative when officers tried to put handcuffs on. JBW was charged with misuse of the 911 system and interfering with an officer."

When the Headline Says it All....

Posted on December 4, 2017 at 2:44 PM Comments comments (37)
"Sex Robot Molested At Electronics Festival, Creators Say.
'Because they did not understand the technology and did not have to pay for it, they treated the doll like barbarians.'”

Down the Drain

Posted on November 18, 2017 at 5:48 PM Comments comments (7)
They say he was done in by his doodie. Police in Thousand Oaks, California, used DNA found in an unflushed toilet to finger a burglary suspect. Detectives managed to sniff out the suspect after they found some fecal matter in a toilet at the crime scene and had it tested for DNA.

“Most people don’t assume or don’t know that DNA can be obtained by other things besides hair and saliva,” Ventura County Sheriff’s Office Detective Tim Lohman said.

His mother must be so proud. How many times does she have to tell him to flush?